Forward with Passion and Power

The snail whispered to me, "move forward with passion and purpose."

...then I was distracted by a tap on the shoulder.

Jenn: Hello, Change; what brings you my way?
Change: Another chance to re-live the good times, my old friend.
Jenn: You are too much; why don't you get on with it and marry me?
Change: You know I cannot do that; I belong to everybody. But you are my favorite, which is why I often visit you.
Jenn: Blushing...

The year has drifted, and changes enter our days once again. Steady and carefree times bare the warning label; comfort and complacency can be hazardous to life. The energy of change compares to the power of glacier ice moving and planets rotating; it's mighty and coming. Being familiar with change, I have experience handling change at some scale, more prominent than some but not as significant as others. Although much protects me, the most effective protection for the future depends on personal handling of the change. Be assured that the change handled well provides a first-class ticket to a better place for tomorrow.

The snail's focus remains on the here and now. The grip and dinner are the most important at the moment. What happens in the future stays out of the equation of this precarious situation. The snail inspires me in how well it is handling this moment.

Change opens opportunities for new. As change approaches, take some time to reconnect with those old faithful friends. Some drift away, but they are never far; reach out. Look at the old and examine the internal motivations of habits and hobbies; have they dampened or require more energy and dedication than you can give? Embracing change demands simple and pragmatic approaches—no need to take unnecessary risks. Seek help and guidance from respected sources. As you soar through transition, know that you will be a mentor or guide for others, so don't blow it.

Change offers a time to embrace creativity and warmth that radiates like thermal drafts from the earth to lift our outstretched wings. Glide freely and high to the destination of abundance and success. Make peace with the changes that must take place for life to move forward positively. Sacrifice what holds you back. Move forward with passion and purpose. See you tomorrow, my snail friends. Love

My surface is well waxed.

I do not worry too much about straying. I do stick to the waterfalls I am accustomed to. My surface is well waxed and quickly sheds even the heaviest adorning downpours. Like any storm, I can see the shower of desire and lust pouring from the cumulonimbus cloud of love at first sight. The drops and often showers of courtship bead off my façade. Safe behind my walls, I can hide from love at first sight.

I watched you fall in love with me, then watched you fall out of love. I held out until you gave up. My first impression, my first sighting, is not someone to fall in love with. However, your best bet is to fall in love with my second impression found deeper inside without a map to follow.

If you love me, you love me, say so; if you love me at first sight, wait for it. If you love me at second sight, say so.

I am scared to talk about love. You, too, should fear talking to me about love. I do not want a love that does not meet me where I am. I love to meet you where you are, but I do not wish to park where we are. To ease my fear means taking on a woman who has the self-centered and selfish pursuit of her grandiose dreams. Maybe you should just go climb Mount Everest, you will have guides, sherpas and a better chance of survival.

Happy to Cast my Shadow

I woke up this morning particularly early.  Many thoughts were going through my head.  A natural reflection after pondering the news you learned the evening before about someone passing before their time.  Rising from my bed,  I circled through the dimly lit rooms of the house.  A ritual performed to wake up my mind and body.  The night light catches my motion, happy to cast my long-form as a shadow on the wall, a sight I secretly enjoy.  The open terrace door let in a cool draft from the waning moon.  Reaching into a basket, I grabbed some clothes for warmth.   Pulling on a sweater last, I realized it was left unwashed from a midnight Paris.  Her perfumes added to the mental portrait of a beautiful memory. 

My Mind Jumped

My mind jumped to assumptions from the sudden news.  I perhaps unjustly arrived at my conclusions. Maybe I am justified.  Where am I?  We have shared many personal feelings and experiences.   Why am I learning from a text message that you have fallen in love and proposed marriage? 

            Of course, I wanted to say congratulations, but my words became lost.  I stumbled for days trying to recall if you had shared your new love in previous conversations.   I can be terrible at remembering things sometimes.  I thought maybe it happened so fast, like love at first sight.   You had no chance to say, “hey, I got some good news, I met someone, and I hope it works out for me”. 

            You owe me nothing in this world, but if you are interested in why I feel nervous about calling, texting, or planning an adventure, it's because of how I learned about her.   Before I received the photos of you proposing, our conversations were about planning adventures and an experience.  I guess I need help understanding why you did not tell me earlier from a friendship perspective.  Assumptions flew into my head, bad on me, but I could not help it.   Am I not really a friend?  Do you fear her reaction to our relationship, or are you worried about my response to her?    

            I am suddenly confused, pondering how I am supposed to communicate.  When in doubt, I just move on with my one life.  The best thing for me is to ask you directly rather than assume your feelings or thoughts.  But I am afraid to call.  I love so many things about you, your sense of adventure, athleticism, healthy living, willingness to try, and positive attitude.  I treasure my few friends that meet me on my level.  I tremble at the thought of losing you.   

~jenn wren